art-satire-comedy-humor

 

Dark Matters Of The Art Market

Intrigue, forgery, deception, espionage,
and other amusing goings-on from the dark underbelly
of the opaque art market that we all know
and have come to love


In the study of Physical Cosmology and Astronomy, there is Dark Matter and Dark Energy. In the world of buying and selling art, which is an altogether different type of cosmology, there are goings-on that can be called Dark Matters.

How many times have you visited a museum or gallery and seen something that seemed a little “off”? For instance, an attractive, black-clad gallerista calls your attention to a dimly lit piece of “art” and tells you it was just brought in for consignment by a mysterious and anonymous person. It also happens to be a “very valuable and much sought-after work” by a dead artist who sold it to a now also-dead collector…but you can own it for a song – provided you don’t ask too many questions, that is. All this because “you’re special,” as you appear to be a discerning collector who will immediately recognize a masterpiece and also know you are being given the chance of a lifetime to own it at a great price. Such a deal!

Does this sound familiar? Naaahhh…probably not. Dark matters in the art world aren’t usually so obvious.

At least, make not your life a forgery.
~ Z. Nil


When Dark Matters

chef-ingredients-pigments-mediums-art-satire-comedy-humor

Artist Chef

Artist Chef Uses Age-Old Ingredients For New Cuisine By: Lectra Shokk - Food critic-at-large Electrical wire sculptor and chef Mito Makris is taking gastronomic experimentation to new heights. Mr. Makris is developing a whole ...
posthumous-art-profits-skull

Posthumous Art Profits

Making a Killing from Dead Artists By: Morty Headstone – Deceased artist-at-large Hello, my name was Morty Headstone, and like some of you, I considered myself to be an artist. Or at least I ...
alive-heart-beat-pulse-art-satire-comedy-humor

It’s Alive!

You Gotta Have Heart By: Sybil Bilius – Reviewer-at-large The famed bio-artist who goes by the name of Zena Fovia is having her latest invitation-only show entitled “It’s Alive.” After being “discovered” by a ...
spy-redacted-memorandum-art-satire-comedy-humor

A Spy’s Eye for Art

Snapshot of first page from leaked classified art review dossier Leaked Review of a Review Memorandum By: Sybil Bilius – Reviewer-at-large Former US intelligence officer-turned-art-critic, Perry Noyde (not his real name), has released via ...
moth-dance-art-satire-comedy-humor

Moth Bio-Art Controversy

"Moth" - Sumi-e drawing by Nikitas Kavouklés Moths Eat Their Way to Fame, Fortune,and Controversy By: Sybil Bilius – Reviewer-at-large Renowned entomologist-turned-bio-artist Hermione Merkin is rumored to have been selected as a candidate for ...
dead-artist-art-satire-comedy-humor

Dead Serious…and seriously dead

The Art of Death for the Living By: Sybil Bilius – Reviewer-at-large The privately renowned conceptual artist and death aficionado who called herself Cyana de Nyde was recently the victim of her own performance ...
stolen-secret-warehouse-art-satire-comedy-humor

Stolen Art Kept In Secret Warehouse Re-stolen In Daring Heist

Plundered Art Now Missing from Secret Facility By: Wilfred “Squinty” Squire – Crime Reporter It has come to our attention that, some months ago, many valuable artworks and artifacts that were originally plundered from ...

error: Content is protected !!